Ranking the Dancing with the Stars Women: Kristy Takes the Gold

Dancing with the Stars is ON!

The women brought the heat tonight, far outpacing their male counterparts. In fact, Priscilla Presley and especially Kristy Yamaguchi provided some of the most entertaining first-dances ever on this show. Kudos, ladies!

Here are my rankings of the women:

1. Kristy Yamaguchi and Mark Ballas
I mean!!! This dance literally took my breath away. I knew she was going to be good from the moment she was announced as a contestant on the show, but I had no idea she was going to be that good! If she doesn't win this thing, something will have seriously gone wrong with this show. I can't wait to see her perform again.

2. Priscilla Presley and Louis van Amstel
First of all, Priscilla takes the title from Lisa Rinna as Louis' 'partner with the most plastic surgey,' but I gotta say, she looks great. Well done, Doc! Also great was her dancing -- shockingly great, in fact. Precise, elegant, graceful -- she had it all. Funny thing, too, considering every time she appeared on camera prior to her dance she looked like she was going to hurl. She may provide a bit of competition for Ms. Kristy.

3. Marlee Matlin and Fabian Sanchez
You had to figure Marlee Matlin knew she could dance before coming on this show, and she certainly knows how to move her body on the dance floor, but something about watching her rehearse made it really sink in to me -- this woman can't hear the music. The fact that she was able to perform so beautifully truly is remarkable -- expect the viewers to respond, and for Marlee to have a real shot at putting that tacky disco ball next to her Oscar.

4. Shannon Elizabeth and Derek Hough
Derek was right to say that pretty girls don't generally do well on this show (Kelly Monaco and Stacey Kiebler were two notable exceptions), but Shannon may buck that trend if she keeps up the energetic and surprisingly strong dancing she showed tonight. I was ready to hate her (American Pie as your biggest credit? Really?), but she won me over with her long legs and (relatively) sharp movement. Not too shabby.

5. Monica Seles and Jonathan Roberts
I'm a tennis boy, have been since I was 8 years old, and Monica Seles was a favorite of mine from when I was just a kid. In fact, I can remember exactly where I was when it was announced that she had been stabbed. So, basically, I love her and am rooting for her to continue in the competition. Having said that, it was borderline painful to watch her tonight -- not because she was so bad, but because she was so nervous! I'm used to seeing Monica, the grunting bulldog, not Monica, the timid girl in a ballgown! I actually found the softer moments in her performance to be quite lovely -- it was the moving around the floor she seemed to be having a problem with. Hopefully there are enough folks out there like me with a soft spot in their hearts for the Grand Slam champ, and she'll be around for at least a couple more weeks.

6. Marissa Jaret Winoker and Tony Dobolani
I fell in love with Marissa when I saw her perform a song from Hairspray prior to it's Broadway opening, and it'd be difficult not to admire her for going after this show even though she's not the traditional Dancing with the Stars body type. But tonight's performance was a hot mess! Not only did it not even remotely resemble the cha cha, it wasn't even halfway competent. I love her (even though her, um, enthusiasm can at times be a but much), but tonight was not good. It'll be interesting to see if the little big girl gets the audience support.

Read: Ranking the Dancing with the Stars Jason Tackles the Competition